The Saga Continues: The Funeral We Were Not Invited To

Today its been a year since my fiance Timile Brown was laid to rest. I didn’t really think about it until yesterday afternoon. I was rummaging through the library of music on my studio computer and I found this song I made for her at the very beginning of our relationship. I thought about the morning I wrote and recorded the whole thing between 2-5 AM after we got into a fight on the song and she hung up on me. It was about how things like the right person finds you and the line that stands out is “All your wrongs I’m-a right and the future looks bright.” I nonchalantly smirked out the side of my mouth like I do instead of blushing. Hmm.

Well, no one had ever returned my phone call from when I tried to find out about the service and arrangements. The day that she called the family in Buffalo had already told me they received a call saying that they were not invited because they took Timile from her. I thought that wasn’t necessary because even if they were not invited you shouldn’t have told them that on all days.

I spoke to Timile’s cousin in Atlanta who had done a lot for her while she was in college and her time there. He’s a man’s man and when he called me tearfully saying how none of this was right really kinda hit me on the inside. He told me how one of the longtime friends from Buffalo who lived in Virginia went ny the house to give condolences with his wife. Timile’s mother had told her about why and how come she didn’t invite the Buffalo family and whether or not that was right or wrong. She responded in the most politically correct way that it was in fact wrong. Needless to say very shortly after they were kicked out of the house.

As Timile’s cousin and I talked he told me that the venue was changed because people found out and wouldn’t even let people know where she was going to be buried. To this day I still have no idea even if I wanted to place flowers there on her birthday or even just to take Cydney there one day. My problem with everything was that they acted like Timile was just theirs. Everyone else was the enemy who took her away not realizing they pushed her away and out of sadness she wanted to go back home and it was still reluctant that she did. Truthfully, she was mine because her whole adult life it was me who took care of her.

I was also told that in the eulogy that was published in the newspaper they never mentioned her high school or where she went to college. That means none of her friends were able to go either. Who has a funeral that’s invite only? Whatever, though. As we talked we theorized that they did so on purpose because they first thing that comes up when Timile Brown is typed into Google is a publication called “Drawn Out Of Dejection,” a paper in which she went into detail about her bout with depression and it didn’t make them look too great. It’s still up as well. Truthfully told, the work is much longer in which I own the full thirty-three page paper that I will fully publish one day. I won’t do so out of spite to her parents because I’ve forgiven them. It’s to tell her story in her own words.

Well, I was okay with not going to the funeral. I would have probably caught an assault case because as much of a cool and calm person I am I would have been provoked. Plus it would not have helped their cause being around throngs of family and I asked or demanded to take my child and they sais no. That would have made them look bad.

With that said I will just say this: Timile Denise Brown was born on January 4, 1986 in Buffalo, New York. She died at her parents house December 9, 2011 from complications due to ardiocarcinoma or esophageal cancer. She was buried December 17, 2011. She is survived by her parents, two younger brothers, her daughter Cydney Moriah Milner, and extended family and friends throughout the country.

And me.

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