I was having a conversation with my mother a few days ago about a friend of hers. The friend is incredibly spiteful, petty, and many times people don’t want to deal with them. You know, a lot of things you shouldn’t be at 40. She said “She really needs to work on that because you don’t want to block blessings on your child.”
That resonated with me. The old saying is that men who break many hearts have the prettiest daughters as if that’s some kind of payback. I’ve known since I was about seventeen that as God’s practical joke he was going to give me a daughter first. I’m the last one in my family with my name and am eager to get that monkey off of my back. Knowing this, as much as possible I tried not to toy with too many hearts for that kid and my sake. I think I did a fairly decent job. Well, as far as I know because not many have said otherwise to me.
Eight years later, I was right. Even now, as a single parent I try my best to not do such things. I probably have because we all get into trouble. Being a parent changes things. Being the father to a little girl has me thinking a lot more about how women think since I am raising one. I try my best to show interest and date/court people how I would want young men to do so for Cydney. I’m her role model and her influence on how she sees men.
It goes past dating and relationships. I try to be honest with people, be a voice of reason all the while keeping others feelings in mind. Of course, I’m a work in progress. That’s the daily grind of being human: bettering one’s self.
This morning I thought about the things and who I pray for. For the most part I don’t ask God for too much for myself. They’re mostly centered around the things I want for my daughter, healing for those around me, and that God has His way in spite of what I pray for. My logic at this point is that I’ve experienced the hardest things in life I could go through outside of burying my daughter and fighting for my own life, so I’m good as long as I have a paycheck every two weeks. I’m sure there is much more that I could use, but honestly as long as my daughter is okay then I’m great.
I guess the best way to answer my daily prayers is to continue to try to be the best person I can be to others and mine will come to fruition.