Evolution of the Terrible Twos

Let me just say I don’t think that the twos are so terrible.  Throughout the year, Cydney has displayed plenty of the characteristics that are common with this phase.  Then, they went away for a little bit.  However, some of them have come back with a vengeance and a couple of new ones as well. Anything Cydney sees that she wants, she exclaims “It’s mine!” or says “My ____.” If it’s not given to her, she begins to cry and a fit ensues.

Cydney is adamant about getting he way. When she makes a demand and she is told no, she begins to cry (with no tears), slowly gets down on the floor, and throws a fit with kicking and screaming and all the other fun stuff. How do I handle that? It depends on the circumstance. Sometimes I just ignore her. I literally walk right by or over her and continue like it never happened or is happening. Sometimes when I walk off, I’ll tell her “Bye” as I’m off, and she’ll usually get up mid cry screaming “Please don’t leave.” The show is all for attention. Sometimes I’ll warn her she is going to get popped or a “pow pow” as it is referred to. She’ll yell “Don’t pow pow me!” and the recent line has been “Don’t tell me what to do!” When she’s been warned enough or says the latter of those two quotes, she does get popped. Many may not agree with this policy, but in that sense I am old fashioned. It is not to inflict pain as much as it is discipline and always results in hurt feelings and a modified behavior.

I’d say most of Cydney’s terrible two moments come from what she says. She has a smart mouth. She definitely gets that from me, and like her father there is such a charm to it. She’ll do something she knows that she shouldn’t and says something funny to try to get out of it. That is the hard one to deal with. I tell her sometimes as my mother would tell me “That was wrong. It’s funny, but wrong.” Many times I have to hold my laughter until she is not around. I should probably do that more often, but she’s a daddy’s girl so I let her get away with murder.

The key to how I handle these circumstances is balance. 1) She’ll never know where I’m coming from and how I’ll respond, so that fear can rectify many-a tantrums. 2) In spite of it all, I still have to be encouraging. If something is funny then I should acknowledge it. People gravitate towards those who have a sense of humor. It implies being intelligent and knowing how to cater to your audience to make them laugh is a very good observational tool that is associated with leadership. Not to mention, if you can’t laugh, then what’s the point?

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