As an emcee, if someone walked up to me and played what became “Supervillain” by Trademark Da Skydiver, I would have lost my mind.
The law of average suggests in someone’s life story, you’re the hero; and in others’, you’re a villain. Sometimes you’re a round, flat, or stock character, the sad sack, the wise sage, a noticeable extra in the background, an oft-cliched trope, a series regular, a stunt-casted superstar cameo, and/or with a short story arc. You’ll never know who, which one you are, and to whom you play. It’s someone else’s personal narrative; more often that not, it isn’t for you to know, either.
Think of all the people you’ve met in your life. There have been times where you’ve felt down, and a passerby gives a word of encouragement. The brief salutation picked you up and you’ve never told anyone how much it meant to you. How many times have you labeled someone a complete asshole because they teased and bullied you? Guess what? In our lifetime, we are both to several, if not hundreds-or in the age of social media, thousands-of people.
Perhaps the heroes in our lives want to pay forward a good deed bestowed on them. The bully could be an insecure person who learned at home the best-and only way- to express love was to be a dick. We can and will only see the world and the people we interact with from a custom-made lens created by our life’s experiences. Plot twist: we are often the villain in our own life story.
I have made peace with my role in the lives of others as the hero, villain, or any other possibility. For nine out of ten people I’ve wronged, I apologize and probably didn’t mean any of it. To the one person out of the 10, I meant that shit and fuck you (we all have those we feel this way about).
I do not have the bandwidth to hold onto grudges and/or ill will. Life is long and hard; I need the space in my mind, heart, body, and spirit to function at the highest level I can on a given day. The way I seek inner peace from the roles I and others have played in mine and their lives is to humanize their actions. As I tell my friends and family all of the time, people gon’ people.
For example, I don’t think there are too many people who could or would judge me if I hated my “in-laws” forever. Hell, most people would justify the sentiment. The way I see things, they too grieved the loss of their daughter. Maybe they felt guilty about decisions they made with Timile or wanted to right some of their own personal wrongs. In their eyes, I could be an adversary who took their baby away from them. Whatever was their motivation to be whatever way they were has little to do with me; therefore, I can’t take their actions to heart.
Do I like my in-laws? Is there a possibility of reconciliation and to be one big happy family? Fuck no. But I will tolerate them and play nice for the sake of my daughter and my in-laws…and I’d say it to their face.
Sometimes it’s nice to be the villain. In movies and books, the supervillain is way more charismatic and memorable than the hero. For the times I am and do play the role, Trademark Da Skydiver is my personal theme music.
Funny thing is…I never feel or think any of these thoughts I’ve written when I hear “Supervillain.”